My mother, my protector, my guardian
by vee72
Summary: What would you do with a mother like Bellatrix Lestrange? What if you were accepted at Hogwarts? Would you go to escape the torure, knowing you would not be wanted, or would you stay with your mother, your protector, your guardian...?


She has spun the life I live; she is my protector, my guardian;  
regardless of the life I'd love to have lived if I had not been born  
to this family, she is still my mother. Though, Bellatrix Lestrange  
was never a mother to brag about, she is nonetheless my mother.

When I was three, I was sent to the corner for not cleaning my room.  
When I was five, I was told to clean the bathroom with a toothbrush  
for not brushing my teeth. When I was seven I was hit against the  
wall until there were cuts on my face for not smiling properly. When  
I was ten I was tortured with crucio every week for not being  
evil enough, and when I was eleven, I was accepted into Hogwarts.

Hogwarts... I had read about it, dreamed about it, ached for this  
school to take me under its wings, to teach me everything it could,  
and to save me from my horrible mother.

Life for an eleven-year-old was getting better. I knew life would  
be great once I was at Hogwarts, maybe I could even give my friends  
a different surname, for a Lestrange at Hogwarts would be a horrible  
weight I would not like to lift.

Malfoy... now there is a name I wouldn't want mentioned near me again.  
I hope the younger Malfoy doesn't go to Hogwarts. He is terrifying.  
Not as terrifying as his father though, Lucius Malfoy...

Silver hair flowing carelessly over his weak shoulders, a physique  
not worth mentioning, yet still as powerful as my mother, Bellatrix,  
she is an evil witch. She loves blood play, and torture. But, her  
way of torture is by spells and incantations. Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy...  
his torture was just as pernicious, but it had a twist which mother  
could never provide. I cannot forget the things Lucius did to me.  
Yes, he violated me physically, but his mental rape was more  
powerful than anything else. He created a shame, an  
embarrassment...humiliation in the deepest form. The memories whisper  
constantly in my mind, a stain that cannot be removed, although  
I've tried. Lucius created a cruel joke out of me, and now I live  
with the consequences, from my body, right through to my very soul.

My mother introduced me to him when I was eight. By eight and a half  
I was no longer a virgin, by the age of nine I was as experienced as  
most crack-whores on the corner of streets. By ten, I was lost; my  
mind wasn't my mind anymore. I was crucio-ed and raped by my mother  
and her friend weekly, I was taunted by Lucius' son Draco whenever  
he was over, and I was still made to wear my "Lestrange" smile. I  
was an empty shell, and that shell was rotting from the inside out.  
I felt lost in more ways than one. I continued to smile but on the  
inside my body, my spirit was broken. The pain and torture thrust  
upon me by my mother and her friends wore me down until I struggled  
to get out of bed without crying out in agony, the physical acts  
force upon me by Lucius wore me down further, until I couldn't look  
in the mirror without seeing filth. The taunting and the cruel jokes  
displayed by everyone who passed through the Bellatrix household  
wore me down until I couldn't think of myself as anything more than  
a waste of space.

But not anymore, finally, after eleven years of waiting, I'm a  
Hogwarts girl, and, once I get sorted, I will be free. Of course my  
mother will make me go home in the holidays, but that will not be as  
bad as being home with her with no means of escape.

Yes, life will be brilliant once I am sorted with life away from home.  
My mother, Bellatrix Lestrange, will be proud of me, and I will be  
sorted into Slytherin, and life, life will be great.

Slipping the Sorting hat on my head, I hear the brim of the hat  
open, and hear a name I never thought possible. It lasts for  
eternity, what will mother do? I will be killed for sure.

"Gryffindor."


End file.
